Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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