y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
