good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
