Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
