he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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