It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
