Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
