Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
