if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Randomize
