And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
there was a trapeze. enough said
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
