As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
