Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Randomize
