she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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