i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I can't put those talents on a resume
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
wow bdsm is so cute
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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