I only kidnapped one of them. chill
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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