I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Girls should come with a carfax report
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
