so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize