bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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