I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
we're making bets on your personal life
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
