if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
