i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize
