well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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