Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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