i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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