I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize