I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
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