I can't watch pbs sober anymore
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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