On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
