Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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