come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
