Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
