I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
