are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
