I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Randomize
