can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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