hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Randomize
