How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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