i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
