I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
There was a lot of him and a little penis
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
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