How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
