I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize
