There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Randomize
