I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
