Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
