Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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