Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
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