Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Buhtt sex?
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
