Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
