I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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