she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
